Buddha,

Terry Warner is the author of "The Bonds that Make Us Free". It's a book that Burgbud on the infidelity forum has read and suggested. I've only read the serialization of the book:

http://www.meridianmagazine.com/books/011005bonds.html

Just that little bit is enough to keep me busy for awhile while I wait on a copy of the book. I was paraphrasing and there is much much more that goes with the little I posted. It took me awhile to catch on to his thinking, but once I started to put it together, the truths he presents are mindblowing for me. Freedom (on a stick!). If you're interested in reading, Burgbud also had a few more book suggestions on his thread.