WHATEVER the cause of this, you need to seriously give thought to having children with her before these issues are resolved. If you've lurked here awhile, as you say, you can see the long list of folks who wished they had addressed their clashing libidos (one way or another) BEFORE there were children involved.
Having a baby doesn't fix a marriage; fix the marriage first, and THEN consider whether or not having children is something that you both want to do.
