Chrissy... I don't recall in the past H being a morning person sexually speaking...this seems to be a new thing since the re-emergence of my sex drive and H's corresponding LD-ness. It's probably easier for him to become aroused in the morning because there's no hint of pressure from me since I am asleep ( no, he is not a necrophiliac,lol) and because biologically it's probably easier for him ( I think CeMar mentioned that testosterone is higher in the morning and men sometimes wake up with erections...is this right)? It's a bit hard for me to go from 0 to 60 in the am, but I'm managing.
Anyway, I do appreciate H's efforts to meet me on the schedule, and on some mornings. What's missing from the picture is my being able to ML when my desire is spontaneously high, which occurs at night-time. We talked a bit this weekend about dropping the schedule and ML when I feel the desire, so that I can feel more in control, and go with what my body is telling me. He's saying he feels he is up for this, so we will see.
Karen... The "tiredness" at nite is frustrating...he does like to get to bed early and he wakes up early in the morning, and would prefer just having a bit of cuddle time and getting on with sleep. He has a demanding job...but how many HD men here on the board would prioritize sleep/job alertness for sex? I know I sleep a lot better and feel comforted on the nites we ML...I just don't get it sometimes.
Anyway, I kind of view our struggles as payback for the damage I caused by being so LD, which was in part due to relationship problems which H contributed to, but as the wise Mrs.NOP points out, playing the blame game will get us nowhere. I am into finding solutions and moving towards a more flexible and enjoyable sex life. Patience is a virtue, repeat as necessary.
