Hello R&R - Can you tell, I now come to this thread before my own
Quote: We had a good time and there definetely seems to be less stress between us since we both started posting here.
This is very cool, looking forward to more of what works
Quote: H laid in bed and read Saturday while I cleaned, and Sunday, I got up early and did some weeding while he slept. It was great because I didn't feel the pressure to make sure he was doing what he wanted to be doing. Every time he gets up to join me while I clean, I just know he is doing it out of guilt, and that puts a lot of pressure on me. Don't get me wrong, I want help around the house, but I'd like it on his terms. When he wants to do something. My time is early in the a.m. before the day starts. That way, I feel accomplished and less guilty when I go out to do my own thing the rest of the day.
OK, I used to do this too. Wake up early, do the chores so that when NG is up, I'm ready for 'us' time. Turns out I was depleting his love tank big time QT is his LL, followed by WOA. By leaving our bed, I was saying that just being with him was not good enough for me. That there were other things that were more important. I have had to re-learn that having a lie in, sometimes just chatting about nothing, was far more meaningful for NG than a clean house (not that we live in a mess, but you know, there is always that little bit more to do ) And I do feel that most of our closeness now comes from the quiet moments we simply be together, not doing anything, just being, and enjoying being with each other. I have to confess, I'm a doer, and this was very difficult in the begining. But it seems we can all learn, if the incentive is strong enough
QT is his LL, followed by WOA. By leaving our bed, I was saying that just being with him was not good enough for me. That there were other things that were more important. I have had to re-learn that having a lie in, sometimes just chatting about nothing, was far more meaningful for NG than a clean house (not that we live in a mess, but you know, there is always that little bit more to do 
) And I do feel that most of our closeness now comes from the quiet moments we simply be together, not doing anything, just being, and enjoying being with each other. I have to confess, I'm a doer, and this was very difficult in the begining. But it seems we can all learn, if the incentive is strong enough 
