Quote: How do you and H deal with this now? My H feels a tremendous amount of guilt especially with work and not being able to say "no" to extra work. SP
Hey SP, I guess I should let Zuki answer this. I personally don't feel he does "deal" with it. At least that is my perspective. If I were him and it were my mother, I would tell her how I feel. But H is so sweet and concerned for her feelings that he never says anything to her. I think he either just avoids her when he doesn't feel like dealing with her, or sometimes gets angry/frustrated with her. But never says anything about how she is... which I can't disagree with. Knowing my MIL, if anyone said to her that her guilting gets out of control sometimes, she would take it very personally and go to another extreme just to make it about her again and how hurt she is... Not to be mean. I just feel that way...
I read on an SSM post (can't remember who) about the 5LL and H and I thought his mother's LL was AOS because she is always doing things for other people. But now that post brought to light that perhaps her LL is WOA as she DOES things for others so they will TELL her how wonderful she is... So, maybe with this new knowledge we can get her to stop guilting a bit by giving her what she needs.
Next time I see her I will try this. Tell her how hard she has worked, blah blah blah -and see what the response is.
