Thanks for your insights. I'm sure most of what you say is true -- and I was with you most of the way -- until you got to the "bait and switch" part. It is PRECISELY the "bait-and-switch" that has many HDs suffering. There are some exceptions, where I'll read a post where the HD says "I should have seen it coming..." or "there were some early warning signs ...", etc., but most of us did NOT see a lack of sexual desire in our partners when we were dating them, or even earlier in our marriage.
Ever play that game when you were a kid? The "if you HAD to be blind, would it be better to have ALWAYS been blind (so you wouldn't know what you were missing), or to have BECOME blind at some point" (so that the visual memories of beauty and of your loves ones' faces were forever etched in your brain).
I never could answer that one, but I'm sure leanin' toward thinking it's the former . . . at least for me.
