Re Mrs NOP Do you guys ever get foot rubs and back massages in return?
I get a light back rub for 5 minuets if I am almost dead and ask for them. Generally the answer is no.

Here is usually what happens, I do her back or feet, she does the dog's back. Not much comes back to me. I do it to feel connected but recently, too many times, I just feel more disconnected after doing her feet or back after a little while when I start to feel the no progress cycle over again.

Like CeMar said, back /foot rubs cause W to get sleepy, meanwhile I am thinking about being more emotionally connected and maybe ML all the while I rub away. Sometimes the more I do, the further I am away from where I would like to be.

I am getting better (or worse) at stopping sooner or not even starting so I don't feel so drained if nothing happens that benefits me.

There are lots of pent up feelings that have to be reabsorbed or redirected so they don't sour and spoil some of the good times we do have. Anyone know to do with sour milk/affection. I hear cheese making can be a hobby. I also see it is not easy for BB, so I just keep plugging along.

Lou