I know its tempting to snoop, but I'd try not to, as your goal is to show her respect, and also b/c you may run across content that really zings you.
She sounds like my X - who told mutual friends almost triumphantly how she 'survived' the D process, as if it wasn't s/t nasty that she put into play and made happen. Yet, maybe their 'getting better' means being less depressed, and maybe less depressed means that they'll be able to rethink their role in the M probs and perhaps remember some of the good as well. X has withdrawn from key people as well, those she knows have access to me, and who might know my side of the story. Likely due to guilt/fear.
