Hey Sadfish, a few questions: 1. Have you investigated the possibility that your low libido is due to physical reasons? 2. Are you on medications that affect your libido? Antidepressants can lower your libido, as can certain birth control pills, and some other meds. 3. How's your general health? Do you exercise? Exercise is good for your body and for your libido. 4. How's your body image? If it's not good, then maybe the whole idea of getting naked is turning you off. 5. Do you get any pleasure out of sex once you get started? Do you orgasm? Does your H know what to do to get you aroused and give you pleasure? If not, then maybe you two might think about seeing a sex therapist. The fact that you two never had other sexual relationships might suggest that you could use a little guidance. Making love is more than putting tab A into slot B.
This is a big problem OF THE MARRIAGE. It's not your problem alone, but you need to work together, and by yourselves, to solve it. Know that if you don't put some major, observable, consistent effort into solving this problem, that your marriage is doomed.
