What is she saying?

[mastateflower]

Remembering that non of us are professionals here and that each of us come from differnt backrounds and prospectives, but given that, since you asked, (over in my thread) I'm going to give you my opinion.

I see this two possible ways. One way is that she truely doesn't know what she wants. But you have to remember if she is thinking about you...it will never be the same. You can't "fix" the marriage. You can't "save" the marriage. The marriage is over. If you two have a chance, it will be in a completely new relationship. That means if she has interest in you,you have to start by dating her again. Stop pushing her into self help books or e-mails stating what you think went wrong. Give her some time to think about things and then try asking her out. Try starting completely over. Get to know her all over again.

The second possibility is that she is making the mistake of thinking that she can let you down easily. My X tried this. All smiles and promises about being friends. Made me think there was a chance when in fact he was already moved on with his life and making long term plans. The X doesn't understand that letting you down easily can be more painful then just getting it done and walking away.

If the second case is what is really going on then of course you need to cut all ties and move on with your life.

In fact even if it's the first case, you need to move on and then just see if there is room for a relationship with her in the future.

So...my advise is that you buy the motorcycle. Don't worry about what she thinks. It's not any of her business anymore. Start hanging out with the guys. Have a little fun. Spend some time with your family or old friends. Go back to school and take a couple of classes. There must be all types of things you could take that would be related to work. Would get you out of the house and maybe help for the futre. I won't worry about a house yet. Get your feet under you first. Enjoy life...then worry about her.

Gigi