hairdog, honey got me thinking that maybe my bf is an 8 not a 7, and that sent me to the enneagram book where I've been reading about 8, 9, and 1. You might find this interesting and affirming re your W:
Quote: To give a false sense of autonomy, the personality creates what psychology calls ego boundaries. With ego boundaries, we are able to say, "This is me and that is not me. That out there is not me, but this sensation (or thought or feeling) here is me." We usually believe that these boundaries correspond with our skin and therefore with the dimensions of our real bodies, but this is not always true.... While all of the types employ ego boundaries, the 8, 9, and 1 do so for a particular reason--they are attempting to use their will to affect the world without being affected by it. They try to influence their environment, to remake it, control it, hold it back, without having their sense of self influenced by it. To put this differently, all three of these types resist being influenced by reality in different ways. They try to create a sense of wholeness and autonomy by building a "wall" between what they consider self and not self, although where these walls are varies from type to type and from person to person.... Type 1 individuals... hold a boundary against the outside world, but they are far more invested in maintaining their internal boundary. All of us have apects of ourselves that we do not trust or approve of that make us feel anxious and that we want to defend outselves from. Ones expend enormous energy trying to hold back certain unconscious impulses, trying to keep them from getting into counsciouness. It is as if 1s were saying to themselves, "I don't want that feeling! I don't want to have that reaction or that impulse!" They create a great deal of physical tension to maintain their inner boundaries and hold aspects of their own inner nature at bay.
