Disney World Marriage Test

[nightrunner]

If you ever want to really know what the state of your marriage is, go to Disney World with two kids. We were there last week. Very hot, very crowded. Wife complained from the start about the crowds, son complained from the start about the heat and just wanting to go back to the hotel (he is 8). For the past 8 months, I have been trying to be more tolerant of others and not judging others because of what they do or the way they act. I guess this was just too much, because when she started up about the crowd and then my son started, then my wife started getting upset about him, it just started a meltdown. This is not the place to go if you have kids under the age of 11 or 12. Even the rides that they say are ok for kids above 48 inches are, in my opinion, dangerous. A kid freaked out on Mission Space when I got off of it. I had to hold my son's head on the Dinosaur ride so that he would not bash his head on the side of the car. My advice is that unless your marriage is bulletproof and you are getting laid at least 5 times a week, do not go anywhere near there. Spend your 5Gs on something else.
Now to the relationship part. It was as if the past 6 to 8 months had never happened. For starters, my wife says that we have been getting along great. She, however, has not really made much progress on the sex issue. She keeps saying she needs to work on that, but does not. So, I figured that since she would be in MOM mode this week, I should not count on much togetherness. I do not understand why she can not be a wife at the same time she is a mother. My relationship with my wife is first and formost over my relationship with my kids. I feel that if the kids see a loving mom and dad, then they will be ok. One thing throws everything back to the feelings of doubt I get about our marriage. She can say some of the most hateful things to me and then act as if she never said them or act like she has no clue that what she said affected me at all. She told me I had been an [censored] since the trip started. I took a few minutes and then told her that I did not think that was fair. I ask her to tell me instances of when I was being an [censored], and she said nothing. She later apologized blaming it on the stress of the trip. The next day, she was back to being distant. When I asked her why she was being distant and pissed, she said she was not. When I told her that if someone thought she was being that way, that she might want to look at the possibility that she was being that way, she went back to name calling and blaming. I do not think I am perfect in any way, especially with the kids. I tend to be on the strict and careful side of things, but have been really working on it and am much better than I used to be. I try to not let people affect the way I react. I have found since I have been working on this, that I really do not like being around people who bitch all the time. I also do not know how much longer I can live with trying to be a couple only to have to still make it an issue to have sex with my wife.