Truth is A. I am in a relationship where I am loved but not for who I am. B. Though I know it is not fair to him I am not going to get the [censored] knocked out of me for doing what I feel is in his best interest. Until he sees it that way I am not putting myself in harms way by trying to do what is best for him BTDT. C. Even while he was subsituting me in the household he was harrassing the hell out of me. So that still equals no happiness all around.
I am not doing him any favors. I am wide open stating that. Have never denied that the reality is I have done him a discredit in the past. My misery may be my repentence who knows. If I go with my belief of everything happens for a reason. That makes sense. But by excepting my mistakes and not shucking my responsibilitys to others and there feelings maybe just maybe the reasons will become clear and something will become of it all. Who knows.
