choc, you are too funny (and sweet)! (You can just grunt in response, if you want to! )
I was trying to explain to someone else what it feels like when you want to completely open yourself body and soul to your partner and they simply are not interested. My friend said it is like a child who is bubbling over with love and runs to their parent for a hug, and the parent just brushes them off. Not because they are busy or distracted, but because it just doesn't seem to mean anything to them that the child wants to connect. They don't get how important and special this is. When my friend said that, it rang so true that I cried.
To hearken back to the days of Transactional Analysis ( circa 1970... each person has an inner Parent, Adult, and Child), it is the H's "child" and the W's "child" who have sex. Sex is grownup play. It's the sweet, open, vulnerable, innocent, trusting part (the child) that wants to share sexually with the partner. This is one of the reasons why sexual rejection hurts so much. Because it IS your sweet, open, trusting inner child who is rejected. All the more hurtful when your partner sees your sexual advances in some threatening way... the child is completely hurt and mystified by this.
)
