Dancing with my Devils

[cinemanymph]

I wanted to give my response to this some thought. I fully relate to the "dusting off of boxes" that you refer to. I often described abusive events in my life as being locked away in a box, compartementalized into parts of my thought processes that were unavailable to me for examination. The employment of dissociation for survival is complex and takes many turns to undo. You have taken a vital first step in recognizing that there are issues to be dealt with and have put into motion a plan to deal with them. I know sticking with it can be rough and it can get downright terrifying at times, but it is well worth the work to get through it. You description of your childhood is one great sadness and very little support. I commend you for taking on your issues. Those boxes are difficult to deal with now, but in the future will begin to take on a different shape. They will contain the same things, but as you work, you will begin to see them differently. They won't contain the terror, pain, and loss they do now. Don't expect it to be a smooth ride, no ride worth taking ever is. My prayers are with you, Chrissy.