I have NO CLUE as to tell you what to do. Although I will say that sometime back when my H and I were discussing our R and we were both in a great place, acting mature, and accepting that we did indeed love each other and were committed to each other...we discussed this issue.
I told him how much I loved it when he showed me affection...but he said, "not too much". Right. Not in overdrive. Men like a bit of mystery from women and women like a bit of playing hard to get too. I think both parties (it is not a "game") it is a wisdom that you know to put some of the mystery into the R.
I told him that I loved A LOT of the kissing, pinching, teasing etc. But to keep it not too much...I'd appreicate him more that way. He totally accepted it, understood it etc.
He knew what I was saying was not rejecting him...although if he went by his "feeling" rather than his "gut"....he may have reacted immaturely. I think GREAT R have mature love...so to speak.
Anyway, perhaps it was that we were in the place in our R that I strive to be in ALL the time. Secure, mature, listening. Had I brought it up at the wrong time I'm sure I would have said it in a way that he couldn't hear, as well as if I did say it right maybe he wouldn't hear.
I've been in places like you. Best thing might be to just let him know you love him. Do what speaks that to him. Then leave it alone and treat him with kindness, courtesy, friendship, humor and love.
I think that these growth things in our R are really just personal growth issues of our own! Getting secure, not being so defenisve and taking things personally. Those are my personal traps that mess up my R.
