Well, we survived the vacation - barely! How does anyone actually live in Las Vegas? 100 degrees at midnight is insane! After three days of that, the mid 80s in Anaheim seemed downright chilly!

Since we were sharing a room with my two daughters while in Vegas, there was no possiblity for any hanky-panky to occur. One unusual thing did happen though - my wife, who has a VERY low opinion of strippers, pornography, and the like suggested that I go to a topless show called Bite (something to do with vampires) while we were there. I thought that she was just being sarcastic, since she's very much opposed to that sort of thing. I told her there was "no way I would go to something like that, then have to hear about it for the rest of my life." She said that wouldn't happen, and she wouldn't have said it unless she thought it was OK. Even though she had "given permission," I decided that it wasn't something I wanted to do. It's hard enough dealing with being perpetually unsatisfied! I'm not interested in going to see a bunch of half-naked women that will further frustrate me and remind me of how I have no SL.

When we went to Anaheim, we stayed in an apartment that had separate rooms (kids on one end, us on the other, separated by a living room). I wasn't expecting sex, but thought we might at least fool around some. But when I started rubbing her back, she complained about the heat and asked me to leave her alone. I decided that I didn't want to "ruin" our vacation by fighting about sex (again), so I just said OK, and went to sleep.

It actually turned out to be a pretty good vacation, outside of the heat. I would recommend skipping the "California Adventure" park at Disneyland to anyone going there. Outside of the Tower of Terror, there's nothing there that you don't see every year at your local state fair. Stick to the main park, and you won't miss a thing.

After returning home, I saw that she had recorded a couple of episodes of Dr. Phil on the DVR. I recalled that the last time we had sex was after a Dr. Phil show about couples with sexual problems, so I was curious what the topics for these shows were. One of them was the usual sort of stuff he covers, but the other was about couples with sexual problems. I decided to watch it while she was doing some work on the computer, and it had three segments about couples who had sexual problems in their relationships. The first one was about a guy who was fixated on women's hair, so I just skipped it. The second was about a guy who had a porn addiction, which his fiancee was concerned about. I think this segment might have been the reason she taped the show - she's still angry about the porn DVD she found me with (see other thread). But the last segment was about a couple who were having a problem similar to us - the guy was HD, and the girl was ND. They were having sex about once a week, but she thought it was dirty and wrong, etc. Turned out that it was related to her upbringing, so I didn't really connect with it. I don't think that's our problem - it was never an issue while we were dating and early in our marriage. Unfortunately, Dr. Phil didn't really address it much other than to say the usual crap about the woman needing to get help, etc. I wanted him to say "you're wrong, you're destroying you're relationship, and here's the 1, 2, 3 things you need to do to fix it!"

One thing almost made me choke - the fiancee of this ND woman telling Dr. Phil that he was willing to have a sexless marriage with this woman for 50 - 60 years, if he had to. Of course, he's currently getting it once a week and isn't satisfied with that, but thinks that going without for the rest of his life wouldn't be too much of a strain on his marriage. What bullsh!t! I wanted to throw a brick at the TV. I haven't talked to my wife about the episode yet - she had a lot of work to catch up on from our vacation, so she worked late into the evening last night. I'm going to try to bring it up tonight, and see if we can watch it together and use it to start a discussion (again) about our problems. And since the last time we ML was after a similar event, I'll keep my fingers crossed!

I hate that the lack of a SL seems to be the defining condition of my life! I'm so tired of constantly thinking about it, being angry, self-pitying, wondering what to do. It's so...frustrating.