kml -- kind of ironic huh to lie in bed only to go past one's due date??
WW -- well, actually, I'm lucky that I can work from home so during the week I'm quite (too?) busy. The rest of the time I read or knit or do puzzles or hang out on the computer. I can say...it's a good thing I learned meditation and CALMED DOWN when the bomb dropped because that has helped a great deal.
BUT..it's still hard between h and I although he's being great (with the exception of last night..). He's totally holding down the fort, cooking, cleaning, doing all the errands. Yesterday I had a dr's appt and it was disappointing...no improvement from last week, in fact some backsliding...I spent the day weepy and h just lost it at the end of the day...saying my dark cloud mood might be harming the baby and why was I worried when the dr wasn't, etc.
It sucked and reminded me of the bomb dropping ("do you think I'd pick someone like you? someone who worries and obsesses over everything?") but I didn't throw THAT in his face...just tried to explain how overwhelming this all is for me...how responsible and scared I feel (plus, try spending 24 hours in bed everyday with no exercise, no shower, looking like crap and totally dependent -- how's your mood now?).
This morning he was completely apologetic and loving...but it kind of scared me. I don't WANT to revert to that "old" Sage who worried about everything but this FEELS different to me...it feels warranted...I dunno.
Anyway, we're fine, baby is kicking up a storm. I'm going to be 28 weeks on Monday which is a good milestone.
TTYL, Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
