Lil, What I am saying is that, while my H may view ignoring bodily pleasure as having some value to it (such as fasting), he would not--under our circumstances--see ignoring the erection in the same way. Because *I* am affected by the choice to sleep, whereas I am not when he fasts. There was a time when he most certainly thought that denying himself sex was a virtuous thing to do. He even tried to convince me that this was true. Now, he would say this is completely false.
I guess what I'm saying is that I see how he acts when truly denying himself for virtuous reasons and it just doesn't mesh. Fwiw, fasting is very very difficult for him. Isn't that interesting? However, I shouldn't be too surprised. He has said that he would be much more interested in me if I would say no. There was a brief time in which I was the LD partner and he was VERY frustrated and irritated about that and didn't hide it one little bit.
I read a post last week by a poster named No Hill for a Swimmer and he outlined the behavior of Marines around him. I was sitting there thinking, Yeah that used to be my H. At one time I had to ask him to curtail his going to strip clubs. He's changed so much, it's really unbelievable to me at times when I sit back and think about it. Luckily for him, I am an adaptable person. I don't know if that's from having lots of chaos and change and upheaval in my childhood, or due to the fact that I'm a 7.
Anyway, good luck with the 8 stuff! Hope it yields some new insight.
