I'm reading a couple of books that are helping me. They aren't R books necessarily, but as a Christian woman, they have helped me to focus on who I am in Christ. One is Confident Woman by Annibel Gillham, and the other is Forgive and Love Again by John Nieder and Thomas M. Thompson. The thing that helped me the very most when dealing with my H after the bomb, was realizing that I'm not at war with him, I'm at at war with the powers of evil that are trying to destroy our marriage (just typing this is a good reminder to me as we've been having a tough time lately). I asked God to give me a deep unconditional love for him that would shine through my pain. That prayer was answered. It was my H seeing that love that brought him home. I tried to picture not my H as he was acting at the moment, but the man that he is in Christ and started praying for the Holy Spirit to move powerfully in my H's life. We are still struggling, and it's hard, but God is working on both of us and in the end, He will be glorified.
Just remember, God is ALWAYS for marriage. Satan is always against. Marriage is a three part covenant and if one spouse is faithful to their vows, God is enabled. The bible says to take our vows and covenants with God very seriously. The goal of course (and it's hard to take), is to please and glorify God through our obedience and actions no matter how we feel. I fail at this daily. Some days I want to give up. But God is faithful.
Another book that I'm reading is Biblical Womanhood in the Home by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. It hasn't been easy for me to read and understand what God's standards for a Christian wife are. But, the more I read and obey, the stronger I feel.
