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[Burgbud]

Gwyn, you've gotta follow your heart. If you really don't know what to do, see if you can arrange some time to sort yourself. Would he be willing to consider a trial separation with no dating for 6 months? 3 months? 1 month?

You've said you've given this up to God, but it seems to me you're holding onto it awfully tight. The point of giving it up to God is that you put it in His hands and you don't worry about it any more. You do the best you can, knowing He'll forgive if you make a mistake. You want some peace, but it almost seems to me you're not allowing yourself to have peace. Whatever you do in this sitch, whatever H does, whatever happens, God loves you right? You're going to be okay when you start making it okay. You know this already; now you need to believe it.

Good luck!