I left last night, read scriptures, talked to God and trying to find answers and peace. My H and I talked before I left and for now, he is in agreement for us to take a breather and will "do right by me." I feel some comfort in this. I know that I painfully hold the keys to our marriage and it is up to me IF we continue. Because I am overcome by emotions and frankly a lot of anger, I can't see things clearly so I'm hoping this separation will help. I know that I am venting with you all so bear with me but I am totally insulted, humiliated and ashamed of my H. The OW is so beneath him. Forgive me if I step on someone's toes, but trailer trash. To give up our beautiful marriage for someone who is so disgusting makes it all the worse for me to accept. Furthermore, the relationship that he had with her was very strong which is more insulting. I know, leave it, accept he made a huge mistake and he is truely remorseful so this is where I am. Trying to accept! I shared with my H last night that I respect him for the fact that he's told me everything and I am still hopeful that things will work for us but I need time and space. My H told me that me that I had no idea of his battles and I asked him to share but he said when the time is right, he will. I'm not sure what that is but for now I cannot worry about it. I have to work on me for awhile. Will the answers ever come? I don't feel as though time is on my side. As I've posted, my H is growing frustrated, weary and he won't stand here in limbo for very long. I'm truely under a lot of pressure to make a decision quickly or I chance losing the marriage for good. Any advise?
