This thread is really good. It hits home on where I'm at right now.
I came off as controlling and smothering with my W. I have now realized that and am trying to work on it. She has moved out and says she needs time and space.
I have made it very clear to her that I want to work things out, and that I am trying to make positive changes in myself. In our last R conversation about a week ago, she was pretty much confused as to whether she wants to work things out or not. Said at times she just thinks that it is over, then she misses me when she doesn't see me or talk to me for a few days, but when she gets around me she can't stand me and wants to get away.
So, I had decided that I would just back off and leave her alone to figure things out. But, this morning I was having second thoughts...thinking, "maybe if I send her an email telling her that I believe in our M, that it can be better than it was, that things don't have to be the same as before..."
Then, I saw this thread. I realized that I don't need to send her an email, or tell her any of that. It has all been said before. There is nothing more that I can say. I realized that actions speak louder than words. I have to stand back and leave her alone while she processes everything. While doing so, I have to discover what I am doing that drives her away. I have to work on myself so that the next time we are together she has a more positive reaction.
