I will not mention OW to H now for a week or more and when I do it will just be "How's things, obviously you haven't had your opening yet"
it's good that you dont bring her up to him, but I wouldnt even bring the 'opening to end things' with her either. I know you want answers and want to know 'when', but from all the back and forth I've gone thru and our sitches being so simlar, I have found that in their eyes it only makes you look ansy and pushy.
KDU - to be brutally honest with you, I would have NO expectations from your H right now. And I know your walking on cloud nine and probably doing alot of the same things I did. You start picturing him back home already and how things are going to go, and your thinking THIS TIME it's gonna work and I'll make sure of it, things are going to be great. That's what I did and it felt like such a set up for heartache when he didnt come thru in the end.
I dont want to see that happen to you - I would not put too much into what he says as far as he and OW, sadly he'll never be completely honest and you'll only get his version. Remember theres always 3 sides to a story...yours his and the truth. He makes her out to you the way he WANTS you to see her - he does the same with her. Believe me the last thing he wants is for the two of you to know the truth about what exactly it is he's doing.
Try to look at things this way and see if it helps. Ok, we both know what the deal is - theres no need to discuss 'when' anymore because no-one really knows when, not even your H. You understand and are willing to be 'patient' and wait. So to bring it up 'when' with him is really pointless. He could say tuesday, but then come tuesday he may say well just a few more days. Look for signs that he's really got a plan of ending things w/OW, not just what he says but what he does. If he starts hanging out at your place longer and longer each time, not worrying so much about catching hell from OW - that's a good sign. Things like that.
Make the most of the time you do have together without the worries of 'when'. Focus on having fun together - no R talks unless he initiates them. See how he reacts to you being you, the real you, the fun you, the 'old' you. And then after time if you see good signs then it will be that much less stressful when he does come home. But if you find he's not really making an effort to come home, and just talking hot air, then you may want to ask yourself 'how long am I willing to wait?'
I dont mean to sound negative and I'm sorry if I did. I know how hard this is for you and I hope he comes running home girl, he'd be a fool not to!
