Sounds like you're realizing that his values and considerations have shifted notably from yours, or at least from those he held while with you?
Nicely done holding tight to your demand for respectful treatment. It was good for him to have apologized.
IMHO, I think he was testing the waters in a crude way, and your boundary setting was very important and timely. It was cruel for you to have to experience that, b/c I know that love still exists in you for him. I hope you're dousing yourself in some sizable self-care!!
