Have been visiting your thread for a while but have not had much to say. You are as always being kind and helpful to everyone in this forum.
I see that your sitch is in a period of stasis right now. All for the good IMHO. My sympathies on your persisting physical ailments. What are the medium-to-long term prospects for recovery from these ailments? I hope you feel well.
UD
The 3 laws of DBing:
1. PMA is critical to DBing.
2. Since drop in WAW's PMA leads to drop in LBS's PMA and vice-versa detachment is critical.
3. Validate to raise WAW's PMA and GAL to raise LBS's.
Re my physical ailments - I cured myself of the hyperacuosis after 11 years of suffering with it and now only have synptoms when I have a cold.
The VS and vulvodynia are supposedly permanent but I'm working on that! It's a great deal better than when I first got it (at age 12). I used to be covered in open lesions, up to my eyes on pain meds and steroids, but now I'm not and I'm not on any meds for it.
I was able to have a relatively normal SL from when DD1 was born as childbirth improved it (don't know why). I still suffer with pain after SL and am sensitive to virtually every chemical there is, so can't use soap etc anywhere near feminine bits
I am currently trying homeopathy for it with limited success (it does ease pain but does not cure it).
I am intending to go back to the hospital as they have more treatment options than when I was diagnosed in 1996 (back then I was told, 'you have VS, it's for life and there's nothing we can do. Here have these steroids and go home.')
Now there is oestrogen supplements, interferon (because it's thought to be an auto-immune disease, interferon helps the white blood cells to fight better), and there is surgery, but that's drastic and a last resort option as it can leave scar tissue.
For the moment I am just using homeopathy and positive visualisation and hoping to myself that I recover from it.
The CP, well, that's brain damage caused by prematurity of birth, so that is forever but it's not an illness so I'm not bothered.
There are some advantages to being disabled. I'll list them to keep my PMA up:
1. I never have to stand in queues. 2. Men are always stopping and asking if I need help with stuff 3. I get a lot of extra money from the government for being disabled so I can afford to go on foreign holidays and I wouldn't be able to otherwise. 4. People always give up their seat on buses for me. 5. I think I am more mature than my years because of stuff I have put up with. 6. I can get free medical treatment and free dental care because I'm disabled. 7. I get free access to many educational courses. 8. Job opportunities are great because people are always trying to find disabled people so they fulfil the government's 'equal opportunities' policy. 9. If I go to a theme park, they let me on all the rides first. 10. Everyone remembers who I am because I look different
Long time no post.Your post on your disability got me thinking about mine.You are so lucky to be able to have normal children and should be grateful to g-d for that.
There are some advantages to being a dwarf(also need a PMA boost) 1)cute...very cute 2)every single peron in the room knows who you are 3)always get the attention while dancing 4)woman dont find you threatening and such you can ask them anything(this can also be seen as a con) 5)muscular build with little effort 6)can also use "equal employment" for a job(think my current one did it)
g-d works in very odd ways thats for sure.Going to have a long chat with him when i pass over.
Well, *I* can can normal children but Andy has a chromasome abnormality of chromasome 17 so that meant that with each of our children, there was a 50/50 risk that they would be disabled also.
Luckily all 4 of them are able-bodied. We beat the odds four times! Mind you, I have had miscarriages in the past so I have a theory that those babies I lost were carrying the faulty gene.
Andy is much more 'abled' than me in that he can walk without aid outside, he can lift heavy stuff, he can carry the children whereas I can't. He's basically the same as an abled bodied person, except he's thinner, he ocassionally needs surgery and he can't feel hot/cold and pain like usual.
I remember on more than one time, he ran me a bath and nearly burnt me to death because the water was so hot and he didn't realise!
Also, I can put a pin in his leg and he won't notice (I know because I tested out the theory ).
It's funny because in my family, me and Andy are disabled, Andy's dad is, and my BIL. So's his late uncle and his aunty.
It seems funny to have normal kids, like they're the odd ones out, LOL.
This last post was fascinating. Do you think his inability to feel pain translates to his difficulties with emotion and empathy in the R with you (and with others)?
Not that you need to analyze your X, but just wondering if you thought about it and have any comparisons based on Rs with other men (even friendships).
Imagine chromasome 17 looks like a piece of string. Well, in normal people it is just 1 piece of string, and in people with Andy's disability, it look like 2 pieces of string, 1 glued onto the end of the other one.
This means that when the brain sends messages to the body via electrical impulse, the impulses are slower than usual. The messages still get there but somehow they are scambled along the way.
Therefore his reflexes are all slower than usual, his perception of cold and heat are dimmed, and his perception of minor pain (although he can still feel major pain well enough).
I hadn't really thought about it in relation to the sitch. I don't think it's connected because when we were still married, he was VERY caring. He only changed after the split.
When he wants to, he can show empathy, and he is still very good at being empathic to others, just not to me. I think it's because of our history and the fact that he still cares for me and so is trying to do his damnest not to feel it because he doesn't want to.
As far as able-bodied men go, I have limited experience with them. There was this Scottish guy I had a one night stand with and he was an ex-athlete from the Common Wealth Games but I reckon all that weight training had an adverse effect on his manhood, because I didn't know it was possible to have one that small.
I remember, he took off his pants and I just looked at him and thought 'What are you supposed to do with that!?'
Plus he was really sexually insensitive, which, considering he was my first able-bodied shag, did not give me a great impression of able-bodied men.
Then there was this guy called Graham who was a truck driver I dated for about 5 months but he was a *disaster* because he kept talking about sex ALL THE TIME. When he wasn't talking about sex, he was asking me to marry him (I had about 4 proposals from him). He wasn't vaguely romantic, either. X could do better than that - plus, the first time we went to bed, he said 'so, what happened to your legs, then?' (Grrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!).
It took me a while to realise what he meant.
There was BIL, briefly, but he has the chromasome abnormality too, so I can't compare with him.
Then there was this sleeze who was 36 who followed me home from a Christmas Eve Party and scared the wits out of me, but I won't go into that. He was really creepy.
There haven't really been any others, friends or relationships.
You hold the distinction of being the only LBS on this forum to have actually stuck a needle into the WAS. I know many of us have had that impulse.... I for one would like to give mine a quick kick in the shins...hmmm...maybe worth a try...I am not sure she has capacity to feel pain anymore either...
Sorry, bad joke, I have actually become quite delirious after the latest bomb...I have had more bombs dropped on me in the last couple years than Iraq.
UD
The 3 laws of DBing:
1. PMA is critical to DBing.
2. Since drop in WAW's PMA leads to drop in LBS's PMA and vice-versa detachment is critical.
3. Validate to raise WAW's PMA and GAL to raise LBS's.
UD, I can top that. I used a razor on my X to remove several skin lesions from her. I didn't even numb them up.
Anyway, interesting discussion of physical disabilities, etc. You've got a great attitude Jo. I loved all the positives. Anyway, good luck with your self-injections and the egg harvest.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
Jo, My youngest DD doesn't feel pain or hot and cold as fast because of her disabilities. We are going to have her checked for Prader Willi Syndrome because so shows most of the traits.
Because of her special needs, as her father sometimes I feel guilt, but mostly I feel I am lucky. In my mind I have learned more from her than my college professors.
I agree w/there being a positive upside to disabilities. My s9 has taught me more patience and perserverance than I would have thought possible of myself!
I was also able to w/stand giving him a daily shot for two months even tho I dropped out of nursing school when it came to the needles!
Our only downside is that his disability doesn't 'show' until some1 tries to talk to him. T
I for one would like to give mine a quick kick in the shins...hmmm...maybe worth a try...I am not sure she has capacity to feel pain anymore either... 
