That's not good, that's way abusive, and I'm sorry to hear about it. Him hitting you is not your fault, though. What is he, like a trapped wild animal? Lashes out when he feels caught? Don't listen to his threats. They're just words meant to intimidate or vent or hurt. He seeks to blame others for his feelings and behaviors. He'll eventually do the same with the OW. Hugs to you, BQT.
We all wish to be loved. You will be loved again, someday soon. Look at this period in your life as temporary, an in-between relationships time, and try not to let that longing bother you right now.
