Quote:

Recently, I've had some problems finishing the act, or popping. It doesn't faze her a bit. I would think that she would be just as devastated for me as I felt for myself. But no, it just hasn't really seemed to faze her at all.




and
Quote:

I feel the need to explain the diference in perspectives so that she understands that what to her is "no biggie" is to me "going out of my mind." I have made my peace with her perspective of "no biggie." But I still need to make her understand my perspective that popping is the real deal to me, and I go crazy if our ML ends before it happens.




I'm not sure what your goal is on this one. I think you might want to reconsider this sense that the failure of either or you to orgasm should result in mutual "devastation".

Devastation is not a good emotion to be shooting for in sexual issues.

Failure to orgasm is going to occur for most folks at some point. I don't see how having the two of you burst into tears with howlings of pain is a workable solution or desirable outcome.

Did you tell your wife how upset you were and did she dismiss your feelings? What is causing you to think she doesn't understand?

OTOH, if I were you I would look into the possible causes. There are some medications that can impact your ability to complete to orgasm. You may want to discuss it with your physician.

Here's a couple of links:
Orgasmic disorder and another link.

MrsNOP -