Wow the I want you to not want me is even new to me. I have wanted my H to be able to touch me sometimes without it becoming sexual to him. But I do not think that is quite the same thing your W said.
I am pondering so many thoughts as to undlerlying meaning. But I am more in the WTH arena. As in what the hell does she expect you to say. Okay dear! Not Maybe okay dear I understand you do not want me to want you. I understand you want to live as best friend/ room mates. So since I agree to no longer want you for fufillment of my emotional and physical needs is it okay with you if I want the neighbors wife. Or the lady in the bookstore or even my sectretary in this aspect? I feel this is the only way to meet a aceptable comprimise to meet both of our wants. This will allow me to still fill your emotional need for me to be your best friend and be here for you. And it will allow me to fufill my emotional need to be in a mature and emotionally and physically fufilling relationship while remaining your best friend.
Yes that would be my line of thinking as to the answer/response she should expect to recieve if you said okay. But just my line of thinking.
I am so sorry HD since from the outside it seems this lady is making you sit up and do tricks over and over again. I can only imagine what it feels like from the inside.
I am wondering if this is more of her unconditional love angle myself. A test of it or what the reason was for it in the begining ie making you make a promise then making it impossible to keep to make you just like all the others. I do not have a clue really though.
I am just adding my befuzzled thoughts to your own.
My H would have responded somewhat as your wife did . A meal is not a meal without meat in his POV. The only differnce he would have gotten up and cooked some meat even if it was a hotdog.
