Wow! You might as well have just asked him to remarry you. I suspect you know that you shouldn't have listed the ways in which he was "leading you on". From what you have written you might have put too much stock in "baby steps". You will now make him leary of even doing the small things for fear you will overinterpret them. What's wrong with just going with the flow? Your expectations of him are through the roof. You sound like me.

Okay, I've beat you up enough. Yes, back to focusing on yourself and your s. No amount of guilt or nagging is going to turn your X into the father he should be. Perhaps you're even standing in the way of him doing the right thing. The flat out telling him "come see your son...he misses you" approach is a cheeseless tunnel. Try something else.

About going dark. You should do that only if the intent is to spend that time working on yourself and not worrying at all about your X. Don't do it if you're thinking it's a way to make him miss you and want back together.

In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
Abraham Lincoln

It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.
Theodore Roosevelt