A few other 180s: trying to keep the house clean and doing little bits of extra stuff around the house (organizing etc..) Uhm..Had a few last night but can't remmember them all now! LOL GO figure! Uhm, OH! Trying to ride my bike at least once a week if not more depending on the weather. I do this with either my son or, if he wants to go, my son and H...Haven't gone with H in three weeks tho. Won't ask him yet tho. Emailing H more about sex etc...sharing mutual sex interests with him. I think that is our main connection b/c he has told me there are things OW does not want to do that I (NOW) have no problems with. We have always been great sexually when we were first together, but then things got boring and dull (me as well as him). Went out and bought some massage oil from the place we bought it a loooooooooong time ago when we were first together. I got the same fragrance we had as last time *scent is the strongest sense tied to memory,they say*. And I bought a sex book! One with pics and stuff in it! I think he was taken aback but curious about them the other day. I also have mentioned to him that I want to buy some new toys as well. (Hey If i can make it more interseting for him, who knows???:)!
Hi Trinaa... You have some very good 180's, and it sounds like they are having a positive effect. Good for you! I am shocked you and H will go have a family outing and bring OW along!! You have some strength, my dear! I'd be careful with that though...maybe something to discuss on your thread? It sounds like you are def. planting some seeds of doubt with your H. Keep him thinking about you and missing you! Way to go!
Thanks still..for the positiveness! I keep feeling better every day that goes by. Today H emailed me and told me he was going to a concert at a park, and I told him I am going to get my hair done. I think he wanted to see if I'd show up there b/c last time he was there I showed up, all dressed up, to seduce him...even tho I knew he was with OW (This was right after he moved in W.her) and I danced and had fun and he felt miserable b/c I wasn't with him and every guy was watching me. That's when I knew I had a certain sexual power, even tho he wouldn't admit it! He said it made him angry and that he had a horrible time etc...but I think it really made him upset to see I could have a good time w/out him. I am going out after work tomorrow with the ppl from work cuz it's our last day of summer school. Haven't told H yet, not sure if I should.
Another 180 yesterday! GOT A PERM! IT LOOKS GREAT!:)Saw H at the grocery store today, OW was in his car..I hung w/ him for a bit in the store, then we hugged before he got to the car *Car was on side of store, so I don't think OW saw* damn! H asked me to make sandwiches for S and himself for tomorrow';s BBall game. I told him that's why I was at the store;). I made it seem like I thought of it first. good thing is, he didn't ask HER to make them!
Hey all, Today I went to the Renaissance faire..while H and S were off to the BBall game. I had a great time! Got a henna tatoo on my wrist, bought some Bdancing stuff so I can start practicing for my next 180...bellydancing!:) I am Armenian so I better know how to Bellydance, it's in my blood! I am hoping H will be over one day long enough for me to show him what I've learned!:) He told me tonight he feels like giving up on everything, life etc..not sure if he was drinking, sometimes he does that. He said he'd talk to me but not yet. I am trying the 180 of being a good listener rather than a talker. I think it is working.Here is some of the convo we had on IM... G1: all i will say now is i feel like giving up most of the time... more later maybe t5: ok, well dont give up.. t5: i told u earlier how i feel t5: that u can try again G1: we will see, getting harder and harder not to t5: thats all im saying for now t5: give up on us? G1: life G1: everything t5: u cant do that G1: in genberal t5: u need to talk to someone t5: talk to me... G1: not now t5: talk to someone neutral even... G1: see ya whenever, i will try to get u a blanket(in reference to the giveaway at the track), may just give u mine, night What do u all think about this stuff?
Alright, since nobody is doing anything shocking... After the closing on our house, H said he'd email me in a couple days. So wound up going out of town for a couple of days, so emailed him just to let him know. He calls...wanting to know where am I going? I say..oh, just to a little resort town for a couple of days. Staying at this quaint little inn. So I can tell H is wondering and wanting to ask, but doesn't and I don't offer. Ooohhh! Gasp! Alright, not that shocking. What have you all got? Come on now!
I don't have much else. Nothing new in terms of H..I think I need to go dark for a bit tho, let him come to me if he needs anything. He's going away this w/e (Our anniversary is Sunday so is the OW's Bday, what a #&^$*&% coincidence NOT!)...So I am having a get together on Saturday and inviting my cute guy friend from college!:).
Hey all again, Need some help in this dept...What if, I have put my effort so far into my H and changing and all that 180 stuff, and it seems to be working but I'm still not sure...What if i have a male friend who I want to hang out with? B/C he is giving me the attention I need...is that okay? It felt okay today...actually, it really felt great when I called him! We are both going through emotional crap w/ R stuff, and needed to talk and just hang out...aNY ADVICE?
kk SO i know in the last msg about 180s I had put that I mentioned not cheating on H b/c of my virtues...I need advice on this one ppl...Is it a 180 if I do? or a 180 if I don't? I am sooooooo confused...there's this one guy...from my past...sigh...HELP! LOL
If you are here to save your M, or just yourself...I don't think cheating is what you are looking for. It only will make things more complicated and make you feel more confused than you already do. Hanging out with a guy friend is one thing, and sometimes this is something that gets the WAS paying attention, but if you are putting yourself in a tempting position, it is not healthy. If and when you are absolutely sure you don't want to work on your M and you are healed from this...and you want to date, go for it. Until then...I wouldn't consider it.
He said it made him angry and that he had a horrible time etc...but I think it really made him upset to see I could have a good time w/out him. I am going out after work tomorrow with the ppl from work cuz it's our last day of summer school. Haven't told H yet, not sure if I should.