I think problem #1 is at the root of your anger or need to "vent", kwim?
You feel mad because you are bottling yourself up, but who is bottling up whom? YOU make the decision how to act and then feel mad, mostly at yourself, for not being true to yourself. It is a weird thing, isn't it.
My advice is to incorporate more of your true personality into your daily interactions with W, while at the same time not being needy or grabby. Make the sexy joke, give the hug, tell her you're in the mood for ML later on, etc. Think of it as GeekSpeak Lite.
It may not change your frequency, but you will feel better about yourself. Also your wife will not live in a fantasy world where you are perfectly happy with the amount of sex. She will have the ability to see for herself just how much it is on your mind and she can make an informed decision about whether she wants to up the frequency, or choose to not live with a person who thinks about sex that much.
It is a fine line to walk...being yourself and "imposing" your views on her, but you will know the right amount. If nothing else, it will elicit a bad reaction from her, and you can break the silence that you two are both currently facilitating and which is doing nothing positive for your situation.
