Thanks Mel! Using most of your suggestion, I can just reiterate that the kids and I don't get to spend much time with my family and that I really think it's best if we stay there and that I will do whatever I can do make it comfortable for him, not that my parents would make anything *uncomfortable* anyway.
I'm reluctant to say "I think the more time we spend with my family, the more they will see that I am truly dedicated to having a life with you" because I have not made the decision that I am dedicated to having a life with him by any means. I'm dedicated to never betraying my M vows again and I'm dedicated to trying to work things out, but by no means am I dedicated to spending the rest of my life with the person he is today. So, with that being said, maybe I could modify it a bit and say "I think the more time we spend with family and the more they see that we are constructively trying to make things work, they will be more inclined to accept that". What do you think? I thought about mentioning that he could always talk to my parents as well. When my A came out in the open, I had to suck it up and call his mother and say "I understand if you never want to speak to me again but I would like to talk to you if you can". That was really HARD, but I realized that when I hurt my H, I hurt a lot of other people as well and I needed to clear the air with them as well as H. My family feels the same way~when I am hurting they are hurting and H has done some really hurtful things and they might need to hear him say that he's going to deal with it better in the future, that the worst is behind us and he needs their acceptance again. My parents are very forgiving and do not hold grudges. What do you think about suggesting that?
"Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
