Met w/ a good friend who 'came out' to me in terms of his homosexuality. We met to talk about our parallel efforts to improve/transform our lives after hard times. He learned of my S/D 3-4 mo ago, and he noted that he saw in me a commitment to change positively that he'd not seen in anyone but himself. I felt humbled by his compliment, and told him so. It was fascinating to hear about the need to push for growth in all areas, and that it was so easy to let one area slip if one overfocused on another.
Had a great time with S5. As I noted earlier, I negotiated w/ W to increase my overnights w/him from 2/month to 6! This is wonderful. S5 was anxious at first, asking me about how many nights he got to stay etc... then we got into our routine. We did a lot of nothing this weekend - to a museum to see dinosaurs, to a record store to listen to music, to a movie (saw "Chocolate Factory" - very cool!), church, and lots of superhero play at my place.
My older sister called and noted that she was proud to see how I have responded to the S/D, saying that I look healthy and seem mentally/spirtually strong. She doesn't know all the 'meltdowns' or backslides I've shared here on the BB, but I do feel measurably better than I did pre-bomb. Unlike in the past, I smiled, breathed deeply, and thanked her for the gift of her compliment.
At dropoff, S5 raced in and told W that he hadn't wet the bed. W looked rough, like she'd been holed up for most of the weekend. She didn't want to talk w/me taking things from my hand at the door, as if to close it on me, then caught herself, and invited me to get my mail. She likely was PMSing as it is about the right time. I shared w/ her how I got S5 up to use the restroom everytime I had to go, and that this seemed to do the trick. W rolled her eyes and said "yeah-yeah." She's using 'pull-ups w/him despite his 6yr BDay in one mo. S5 has shared w/me that he doesn't want to wear "diapers" and I agreed to hel him re-learn his nighttime toilet training. I also began to teach him how to tie his shoes when he's w/me. I figure, rather than say, "Well, I only have him for X number of days, can't be done", I'll press on with him, and do what I can, letting him experience patient, loving instruction.
Anyway, looks like there's a need to give her space and work at staying positive and upbeat myself.
