I think you are doing great in your convos. You know what, I feel that it is better to have an R convo where you validate and DB well than to not have an R talk. The bad thing about having an R talk is that you will hear things from your WAS that you dont want to hear. Now, if you have a meltdown due to that, then the R talks are bad. But if you can maintain composure and validate then actually R talks are very useful. I personally believe that the road to reconciliation is paved with R-talks, some are bad, but with time and DB knowledge they get better. And then the R gets better (one hopes). There is no other way to clear the air really.
UD
The 3 laws of DBing:
1. PMA is critical to DBing.
2. Since drop in WAW's PMA leads to drop in LBS's PMA and vice-versa detachment is critical.
3. Validate to raise WAW's PMA and GAL to raise LBS's.
