hey WAWfighter My H just told me a couple of weeks ago "this is hard for him because he has spent alot of time with her and has developed feelings....sorry i don't want to hurt you but just being honest" Since when do they really care about being honest? Only when it can really hurt us? It feels like a slap everytime they are "being honest" but what about the A, was that honest? and all that an affair brings to those of us involved? I think it's their sick way of making themselves feel better about what they are doing, because they feel saying what they are saying is HONEST but they never seem to follow through with the rest of it, like if OM is going with her. It's like they give you half of what you are looking for and leave the rest up to you to decide. so don't ask it doesn't feel any better knowing, it just makes that OM seem important to you, which he shouldn't be because then he becomes the focus instead of you. Maybe when you don't ask about him it gets W wondering "hey why isn't H wondering if OM is going?" Then her mind can come up with it's own conclusions of why your not interested....like what's he doing, is he moving on, what going on in his life that i don't know about. Hope this makes some sense. I do know how you are feeling though because for the last week i myself have been wanting to ask what is going on with OW since she found out H and I were together. It really hard but stay the course and you will see the benefits...i think i have maybe a little by not asking because ive now focused on me and how i am with H instead of her & H together. If i focus on me then i am happier when talking to him and when i focus on her i am angry, hurt, and ready to kill...kidding about actually killing and i know that he senses all that in me.
Hope this helps a bit and i know what you mean about sundays..just find things to do ANYTHING!!!
