Quote: there is a part of me that says by forgiving them it means I am saying it's Ok for you to mistreat me..
Not really. If we consider that there are always consequences to bear for our thoughts, words and actions, this is not true. We are responsible for our own consequences and everyone else theirs.
Forgiveness means erasing the debt. Not superficially (saying the words does not constitute the truth of the actions) and before you're ready. I think it helps me to ask myself, "Did that person deliberately set out to hurt me? Or was the hurt that I felt a result of action they took without considering me?"
It's most often the latter, and I find it much easier to use the opportunity to teach and learn. They are still accountable for their sins... just not to me.
Make sense?
How ya doing today, Slowly?
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Betsey 
