Trying to find MY way to happiness

[ValerieA]

Hey there, Kim.

Wow -- Another AWESOME post ! I LOVE it because you are sooo right on the money.

...Being alone allows us to re-discover ourselves...
It can be a place of great personal growth and knowledge about ourselves.
I know that I have had to reintroduce myself to the "new Kim" in a way that is unlike what I have been used to.
But, in the end it WILL provide the both of us with a much more peaceful life.

ABSOLUTELY. ...but change that to the "new JV".

So, JV... when things get complicated or unclear for you and your sitch... Try to ask yourself: "What needs to happen so I can re-find my true happiness?"

I need to focus on MYSELF...MY well-being....because I OFTEN find myself FEELING like "the victim" here. I still frequently have thoughts asking, "Why did he have to do this to me? Why did he hurt me this way? What did I do to deserve this?"

Ok, so...maybe I was "controlling" with my behavior or with my decisions that I thought we had made together. I didn't listen to his rantings as much as he needed me to, and I didn't go back to work like we originally planned....but how does any of that justify what he did? How could he abuse my devotion and my love for him like that?

Maybe I really haven't forgiven him at all. Maybe I've just been trying to forget without forgiving first.....It's tough .....especially when this EA wasn't the first. I had forgotten about the others (all were pre-M), but then it all came back after the bomb dropped.

"The Best Revenge is Living Well"... That is so true...

I like that , and that's what I'd like to do. I need to pay attention to me, and not to "why did he do this?" stuff...or even "why am I putting up with it again?". I feel like I'm allowing H to run all over my feelings, and I don't want that to happen anymore.

Thanks again, Kim . You are TERRIFIC!

JV

"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination."