I've not had time to post, but thought I'd update quickly, I find it helps me to track what's going in in our sitch.

bleh, today ow is back in my usual parking spot, however, I guess maybe the laugh is on her, because she got my spot because she was here before me. she was here before me because I was 5 minutes late getting to work. I was 5 minutes late getting to work because H and I were talking, and he intiated ml...so take that, ow :smirk

last night H stopped by my office for a minute before leaving work, he was in a rush to get home, which kinda got to me because that's how he used to be when he'd hurry home and call ow. I told him I had been missing him during the day, thinking of him a lot, and he said that was good, he could guarantee there was no one else "pining" for him. I wasnt sure what to think of that, because the day before, he'd told me that he was sure "she'll always carry a torch for me" (yeah, right, h, you and about a million other suckers). My guess is it probably means they had another nasty conversation. He also made the comment that "I'm surprised I couldnt see what a snake she was, I should have been able to recognize a snake. It's just like that song, I should have known".

That song, ok, I should explain. probably no one else on this bb will recognize this or remember it, but way back when we were "kids" (in college probably) there was this weird song, I think called "The Snake", it was based on an old Indian proverb that I've heard. anyway, the song goes something like the proverb: a woman comes upon a beautiful snake, I think in the legend it's an asp or adder, and the snake asks her to take him in and she refused, saying he's a snake and his bite is poisonus and deadly. the snake is very convincing and loving and she is overwhelmed with his beauty and takes him in (the words in the chorus of the song are "take me in, pretty woman, take me in, hissed the Snake". Well of course the snake bites her...the words are "you bit me! cried the woman, and now I'm going to die!" and the snakes hisses "oh shut up stupid woman, you knew I was a snake when you took me in"...

I'm curious, anybody else around here old enough to remember that? Anyway, I always thought that stupid song had a life lesson in it for me, and it has stuck in my mind to this day, obviously there was a message there for H as well, based on his comments. Interestingly, I knew exactly what he was referring to.

This morning as I was getting dressed, H came in a streched out on the bed, with his arms under his head and his legs crossed, and just started talking. he said she was such a devil in an angels mask, that he still can't believe it, that it is scary how he couldnt see it. That she seemed so sweet and loving and underneath it all the real her is the scariest, nastiest person he has ever known (and he's known some)...that our "argument" Tuesday night would have become a raging battle that lasted for weeks with her. That he couldnt stand the constant turmoil and emotional upheaval.

I told him our "argument" (really a heated discussion, we werent arguing) mad me sad, that I had thought all that day how stupid it was and that our time together is too precious to spend on something stupid like that....he commented that there would have been no sadness with her.
That he just had to get away from the emotional turmoil.

I told him I was glad he was "home", that as time goes on I'm more and more glad. That this is his "safe haven", that I want home to be a place of peace and relaxation and fun. He said "thank you so much", and somewhere in there is when things got "carried away"...

H is so tired, he is exhausted. he thinks he's got somekind of a bug/cold, which could be, there is something going around...but I think he is wiped out beyond that. interesting.

Oh yeah, when his alarm went off this morning, H actually laid in bed for a while, I think he hit the snooze button 2X. H NEVER does that, I've always assumed because he's off to call ow at the appointed hour.

H was talking alot between when he plopped down on the bed and our "quickie" and when I had to rush off for work, about the ow's turmoil and angst. He says ALL the therapists hate her (this is not good) and all the business office staff (maybe even worse) and that he believes she will either quit or get fired still, he thinks that's her work history, although she is very evasive about it.

I keep praying that H's work will again be rewarding to him (which he has hated and complained bitterly about for years) and that ow will move on. Interestingly, last night H was talking about some of his interesting clients, and commented "that's why I really like my work" , so perhaps that prayer will be and is being answered. it all takes time.

Wednesday, H told me that on Tuesday he had overheard 3 other clinicians actually plotting on how they were going to turn in complaints on her...he said he had emailed her to give her a heads up about it, and she had said "so you'll back me up if I take this to my supervisor", and he told her no, you're on your own, I'm just filling you in"????


been around awhile!