K, Yeah, I've heard and read that it can be very marriage-positive. I'm hoping for that to be the case here. It sounds like your H tries to be very conscientious of your needs, but just isn't getting it in that one department. Is there a way you can tell him that it hurts when it seems like he doesn't recognize that need in a way that he'd understand? Maybe if he knew exactly what it feels like to you he'd have a better idea of how to fill that need.
