The thing I HATE about the trip is that H is not 1/10 as passionate about any trip we go on alone or with family as he is about this trip. I also HATE the vibe of we have to get away from all the WOMEN in our lives or we'll just die. I hate the vibe of we need to be alone with just guys in order to really have FUN. Ok - I am liberally projecting here. These vibes come from jokes they make. Several of the guys are these long time bachelors that simply don't have anyone but this group of guys. This whole trip is a huge "brotherhood" thing to them.
What would make me feel better? If I felt like my H wildly desired me, boinked me every day the week before the trip (ok - every other), left a little note on my pillow the day he left, brought back some FEMININE trinket just for me (I usually get mailed a post card and a t-shirt from House of Blues), said several times how much he would miss me, and came home and boinked me twice that night. OK - I overstated but something like that would sure help. Instead the week before H is in preparation mode and is "conserving his energy" and the week back he is re-organizing himself. I get a call every couple of days, I call maybe once the whole week, and one call is usually a drunk dial where the phone gets passed amongst the whole lot of them. No phone call is one of those private - I love you, I miss you, I can't wait to bury my face in your noun(s). See where I am coming from?
My body finally released the pregnancy this weekend. It was so heartbreaking. H is so very sad too. Sex is still no go medically speaking. I asked him to go to dinner this week before the trip and I plan to find a night to give him the bj of his life even if I have to get past the wax on/wax off defenses.
I refuse to pout no matter how much I HATE this %^& trip. I am a 'four' so I do get melancholy but I have the good sense to mostly keep it to myself.
