I don't think what you were doing is ravishing; it's more like a playful badgering. To me, ravishing is a passionate kiss that turns into something urgent or just flat out putting your intense desire on the table and hoping that the other person reciprocates.
The problem that SolidMechanic identified the other day is that no one is going to attempt to ravish a person who routinely rejects them. You will not have the confidence to pull it off (why would you) and men, in particular, are going to be very tuned into the "no is no" dynamic.
Having said that, women still like to be ravished. Perhaps the best way to go about it is to ask your wife: If I were to ravish you, how would you like me to go about it?
I admit I had to read your last paragraph several times. The words "not tonight" are simply not in my vocabulary, lol. I realize that's part of the problem. How can he pursue a sure thing, right. Otoh, how can I make it scarce when that goes against who I am and would be an obvious ploy or game.
By pursuit, all I really mean is that I want HIM to be the one who is obviously horny. He waits to see if I am horny before he demonstrates that he is. It gets old having to "go first" all the time.
I asked him point blank the other day if he would show me his horniness sometime without me doing it first and he couldn't answer that.
Thanks for the thoughts on pursuit. I will ponder it some more and see how it applies.
