---------------------------------------------------------- Earlier this evening after coming home from work, H asked me to lay down and take a rest with him and I did...he initiated kissing and all and some feels, then left it at that. He asked when to ML and we decided tomorrow nite...all of this is wonderful and I am not complaining( okay I am complaining but just here). I miss the lustful spontaneity of it all.
Though I do and don't understand the scheduling of things for some I wonder scheduling sex like it was a doctors appointment does not make a person approach it like it was a doctors appointment.( I myself have a schedule of sex no less then 8 times a month but no paticular dates set for such I pick the dates by mine or H's needs at the moment).
Your take on the arousal issue also makes me wonder two things. If your H pressed his member against you and you could feel its hardness yet had nothing to do with it getting hard (the working up stage) would you later start feeling that his arousal had nothing to do with you.( I have accused my H of getting a hard on if the wind blows to hard and resent feeling like it is up to me to please him when it did not start with me). I myself like to take ownership of the deed so I know it is about me. But that is me. The second wonder is if he was in a state of total arousal when you start the act and go through the stages of kissing and petting to get you aroused his arousal will be very hieghtened at the begining of the main round where yours will be minimal still. This would more then likely make him finish the round while you are still only half way through it after awhile would this to not become problematic for one or both of you also. Ego for him let down for you. Well these where just I wonders.
Now the real question. He asked when to ML and we decided tomorrow nite... I miss the lustful spontaneity of it all.
If this is the case why did you not grab his member give it a squeeze and laughingly say well we could make love right now or we could do it tomorrow night. Or if you really want we can do it right now and tomorrow night your choice. I think I already know in part or full what your answer will be. Fear of rejection and not wanting your S to feel pressured. This is not spontaneous behavior on your part it is the act of forthought or after thought.Spontaneity is the act of being spontaneous. Being spontaneous is the act of acting without thought,a impulsive behavior. So you are saying this you miss something but are not actively seeking it? Meaning (I am assumming)if you are thirsty you go get a drink. If you are hungry and need food you go to the store. If you are dirty you take a shower. You do not wait for someone to bring you a drink,go to the store for you or give you a bath. (thats the part I am assuming) If you did you may thirst to death starve to death and stink really bad (on the off chance you are really pampered I have no on the other hand for you) So if you want spontaneity why don't you became spontaneous. If you do it good naturedly and open ended there really is no room for rejection because you are not expecting a paticular result.
Remember these are just my I wonders from readiing your post. I have lots of them I learn from them. I sometimes am not good at stating them. So long winded they become. See now I am wondering if I am of a abnormal breed of people. Because I know someone is thinking well if I am thirsty I will go get a glass of water but I wish sometimes my S would bring me one. Yet I am thinking I am thirsty and either way I get the water is fine with me be it through my own going to the kitchen to fetch it or having it brought to me it is gonna taste like water and I am going to drink it to quench my thirst.
And by the way I did state that I was not good at keeping my mouth shut for long
