Okay...I went out for lunch, came back and then H IMed me again. Said he was jet-lagged. I have to say that we had quite a long and pleasant conversation over IM. No mention about our sitch, other than the part that he said that my dad knows about our sitch and gave him a short lecture. Then he changed the subject. He was amused when I told him that S8 is on a reading frenzy and even read the boring "Peter and Jane" books. We talked about our friends, and he told me that he bought a pair of designer shoes... and said that he would buy me a handbag when he moves to the foreign country....And he would buy some stuff for the boys. (Really...I wanted to tell him to NOT buy anything. But I didnt'.) But BAD BAD yoyo did comment that it's not like him to spend so much $$ on the pair of shoe. But didn't badger him on and on. He went on blabbering about buying me a handbag...I changed the subject. Anyway, I do think it was a pleasant and good IM session..
Boy you have been doing a lot of yoyoing...but we can all relate. Turn the tables around...instead of you obsessing over H, make him obsess over you. It's like by him leaving he's 'gone dark' on you and you are responding how we would like our WAS's to respond to us ( it's like he's DBing you ). You go dark, and let him guess about you. But you've done well with the recent calls and IM's...make them short and sweet.
How does your father know about your sitch? If i remember correctly u hadn't told him b/c you feared your dad's reaction to H?
glj - Yes..I know that I have been yoyo-ing alot. Agree with you that he is using DBING on me...with his going away and being DARK. H has just IM-ed me. It's a good IM session. No mention about our R or state of our M, except for one part : H: You better check the semester at the international school Me: I told the boys that u will be back for visit, and they could visit you weekends H: I know..no point checking if I am still in limbo..rite?
I didn't acknowledge his comment about being in limbo. I changed the subject about my bosses being away today. I don't think I am ready to address issues about us either.
Well, my dad know about our sitch because my mom told him about it. It got to the point that the whole world knew about our sitch except my dear ole dad. When I was feeling terrible on Tuesday, my silly ole dad just said "Maybe you should have one or two affairs of your own!". I was "huh??? You raised me too well to do such a thing!" Anyway, apparently dad gave a short lecture to H the last time. But H just kept quiet. I still don't know what my H is thinking. As it seems by his own admittance, he is still in limbo. He is sure that he is taking the overseas job. Hopefully, his mind would be UNMUSHED when he moves outside the realm of the OW. I am trying to think POSITIVE!!
Yoyo I think you are doing well but I would follow advice about being a bit mysterious to H. He still sounds confused and uncertain so it can only be a good thing when he is away from OW as it will help him get his mind straight without any influences.....Keep Dbing I still think you have a good change...KDU
Kim - Thanks for the encouragement... Unfortunately, OW is away with him. I don't dare to even think if they do creep into each other's room. Geez...I don't want to go there. I think H will only have the chance to be alone when he moves overseas for his new job. Hopefully, once he starts with his new job, he will not have anything much to discuss with OW, since it's a different industry. I am counting on us needing to discuss about the boys' well-being to keep in-touch while he is away. I want the boys to know that their daddy has not abandon them. I told H about the boys' concern that daddy is moving away forever, and tried to explain to the boys that daddy would still visit during weekends or the boys can visit daddy weekends and holidays.... H told me that he's gone shopping and bought some games for S8. Not too sure if he is using material stuff to "buy" into his sons' affections?? Anyway, I know I have to keep to my DBING efforts and not derail too much. I need to DRAW him back to wanting this M. I am counting on his new job (or rather old job? H is going back to his old job) for me to have something to talk about with him... (his current job, I do not know much to talk/discuss about)...his tasks, his coworkers, the company's culture, blah blah blah.... hopefully, we will be able to re-connect on this level (other than s@x??!???).. I know for sure that OW will not be able to follow him per se...because of work permit issues, as you would need to include marriage certs to be a dependent in the foreign country. If she were to go, it would have to be that she found a job there, or she visits him weekends. I will have to seize any opportunity for boys to visit rather than OW. But, doing it subtly and not pursuing...
Hey Yoyo I meant when H was away at new job not away this time I know he is with OW.....Anyway I think we are both on the same track yes he will have time to think when he is at the new job as OW wont be there and he might just miss you and the boys even more and realise what he may be giving up. Keep Dbing and time will tell. Live life for you and boys at the moment.....KDU
Hey Kim...yeah, now am just waiting for time to fly pass for him to return from his trip, put in his resignation letter, and then move on to the new job. I do pray hard that he will miss us much much more than OW.
Anyway, H just IMed me again. Said he couldn't sleep as he was jet-lagged. Said that he wanted to take the next flight home. Also said that he missed my BJs and inquired if I have "played" with myself and was shocked when I told him that I have not. Was a short and fun IM session....
H texted this morning...about something unimportant... and then called to let me hear the seminar that he was attending. ?!??? Anyway, he was cheerful enough...
Mini GAL for the weekend.. Sat AM - Yoga for the body and mind Sat PM - Lunch with relatives Sat PM - Fantastic Four with the boys Sun AM/PM - Day Trip with boys and the two grandmas...
Was a short and fun IM session.... 
