Hi There. You sound better and seem to be happier. GAL activities sure help. Good times with your kids is precious.
It's hard for all of us to know what will happen in the months or years to come with our S's. Just know that my W was every bit as cold to me for 9-12 months. Then, by showing her me as more confident, happy, GAL, not taking her words or actions personally, we became like close friends again.
Hi AV8R, good to hear something from you! Sometimes sitting around doing not much sounds like heaven to me. It would be nice to try some this week for me.
I hope you can work with your S15#2 and his issues, homework,etc. Seems like he could use a little extra attention to help him cope.
So - you want to bring my sister from AL to IA on Thursday and pick her up on Sunday and take her back? Trying to find last minute transportation is pretty expensive, but she'd like to join me this weekend. Or I could make arrangements for you and sons to just stay with our friends in IA if you want some time away. It's real pretty up in this area this time of year......huh,huh, pretty please? (begging like a puppy now with big droopy eyes and wagging my tail so hard the whole body sways)
H is off on his trip now........once the goodbyes are done I'm already better. It's always the worst part. I can always hope he'll miss me, just a little bit.....and he'll have a born again positive attitude when he gets back home. Thanks for checking on me.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Nothing I like better than a puppy with big droopy eyes and a waggy tail! What's the weather like up there??? I see a cold front on the way down and bringing with it high winds out of the west-northwest. And Wilma is about to punch into Florida, sending streams of rain as far north as Birmingham probably. In other words, I'm keeping my scardycat butt on the ground this weekend. Much better to be on the ground wishing you were flying than in the air wishing you were on the ground.
I must be getting over the D and XW. This morning someone at work commented that I seemed in a much better mood than I had been in for a long time. Well yeah, I am. I miss the daily interaction with the kids, and I still wish my XW were her old self (the one I married and still love), but overall life is pretty good.
While the boys did their regular workout last night I worked out with "Stumpy". This guy is about 5"6" with a narrow waist and then his upper body just explodes. He walks about like the coat hanger is still in his shirt! We worked the heavy weights and I was burning when we left the gym.
Dropped the boys off at the house and noticed an anti-freeze stain in the driveway where D18 parks. D18's car seems to be leaking so I alerted XW via cell phone. She started whining about car expenses etc. and I told her I'd look at it Friday but she had better keep an eye on the water temperature or not drive it until I can get to it. I told her to check the water level in the morning when the engine was cold and she said that neither of them knew how to open the hood Darn! The old man was good for something afterall! Now, my aircompressor and tools are in storage, so if I have to play Mr. Mechanic again I've got to haul all the stuff to the house. Let's see...swapping a water pump on D18's car is about a 6 hour job at $40 per hour...
Yup, I'd much rather be married, living in my house with my stuff in easy reach. But I can handle single life and have some fun. I just recognize that at this stage of my life I don't want to be on the "hunt". I want someone to share experiences with, fly with, and take care of.
I'm rambling and lunch is over. Keep smiling WCW and continue to fight the good fight. Hmmm...Rocky Marciano used to lead with his face...don't do that!
D18 called this morning to say she didn't see any more antifreeze stains from her car. I told her how to open the hood and said that it would stop leaking IF THERE WASN'T ANY LEFT IN THE RADIATOR!!! She added some water and is on her way to school.
She said that XW told her that "Your dad seems to be happy with the new situation". Well do tell! Did she think I was going to kneel at the end of the driveway nightly, beating my chest and crying mea culpa?? This sitch is her solution to a problem both of us caused. I'm done paying for past transgressions and I'm moving on. WCW suggests there's happiness waiting out there and the search has begun.
I just read your thread and found that you also have twin 15 YO sons like me. And like mine, twin #2 is the one who suffers quietly.
My sit started nearly 3 years ago and my baby boy took it hard. His grades suffered and he became very lazy. I just wanted to tell you that now that my D is done. I make every effort to be pleasant around his father and he is nearly back to his old self. We don't discuss the D or what happened. It's in the past.
When people say they'll "be just fine", they have no idea how hard it is for kids this age. They can end up ok, but it takes a very long time. All you can do is let them live through it. One of the things I did to keep communication open was to sign up for fantasy leagues. We could joke and laugh and be competitive with one another there. I think a turning point was last year when twin #2 won the fantasy football league championship and I went and bought him a t-shirt telling the world he's a champ.
He was so happy. It had been such a long time since I'd seen that particular smile from him.
Just hang in there with him. You will see him come around if he doesn't feel as if you're sad all of the time. They sense the sadness and project it onto themselves.
Hey, thanks for the observation Happy. It's nice to hear from other parents that have similar stich's and experience the same issues. In our case twin #1 is the more social one, typically better in school and more athletic. #2 always seems to be trailing behind in one way or another. Following your lead, I'll be trying to do things with the boys together and individually.
On Friday I'll be at the airport working on the airplane and, if we get it done, I'll take #2 up for a ride and another lesson. #1 likes to fly too, but right now he has a GF and the world revolves around her. Should I warn him
Journaling: D has been final for about a month. Thought I was done. I was busy getting my new place in shape, finding furniture that didn't clash too badly but was cheap (or free!). Still have boxes to unpack but I'm pretty well settled in.
But the unfortunate thing is that being settled in also means free time. Free time to think and remember. Found an old Juice Newton CD and played it. "Break it to me gently" brought a few tears. I started thinking about XW and my family. Sure, I see the kids a couple of times a week, but it doesn't take the place of the daily interaction. And I miss my XW terribly. It hurts even more knowing she has moved on emotionally and doesn't seem to care. Her concern only goes as far as how long it takes the child support check to get to her.
I saw her briefly a couple of times over the last 30 days, when picking up some of my tools from the house. I should have all of them moved by Sunday. No "how are you" or anything like that. She called once during the month to ask about a medical bill. When a change in schedule meant the boys wouldn't be home when I was supposed to pick them up, she had D18 call me.
I'm filling the empty time slowly, but not the way I would really want. I'm going to re-read DR, as soon as I find out which box I packed it in. But as much as I want to tear up the D papers and get my family back, chances look very remote at this time.
I'm a little down today but I'll work that out at the gym tonight. I just wish....
Quote: Yup, I'd much rather be married, living in my house with my stuff in easy reach. But I can handle single life and have some fun. I just recognize that at this stage of my life I don't want to be on the "hunt". I want someone to share experiences with, fly with, and take care of.
WCW suggests there's happiness waiting out there and the search has begun.
OK time to bud into the line up! I used to be killer when it came to catching the bouquet at weddings so best stay outta my way ladies!!!
AV8R, thank you so much for being so lovely on my thread. You really are a shining star!!! Happiness WILL find you again!!! The whole dating thing is daunting but I honestly don't think you'll have ANY problems on that front! The thought of having someone in my life that would "take care" of me is enough to make me swoon! You are SO going to get snapped up!!!
Well yeah, I am. I miss the daily interaction with the kids, and I still wish my XW were her old self (the one I married and still love), but overall life is pretty good. 
Darn! The old man was good for something afterall! Now, my aircompressor and tools are in storage, so if I have to play Mr. Mechanic again I've got to haul all the stuff to the house. Let's see...swapping a water pump on D18's car is about a 6 hour job at $40 per hour...
This sitch is her solution to a problem both of us caused. I'm done paying for past transgressions and I'm moving on. WCW suggests there's happiness waiting out there and the search has begun. 
