For those who dont want to wade through my ramblings (and I highly recommend skipping the old thread, unless you're having trouble sleeping ), here's a brief re-cap.
Me: 32 H: 34 Married 5yrs; together 7years; have a 4yr daughter.
Found out about H's three month affair early this year.
What I think worked:
GAL Acting as if Consistently and calmly telling H that our M will stop unless he ends the A - and following through (this, I hope has worked, unless he has learned to be completely devious and is scared to end the M or the A). Focusing on myself and working on my issues (and there are maaaany!!!!)
H has gone through a third day of being consistent with his actions. Yesterday he even initiated ML. One thing that bothers me, is that he did not say ILU during this time. Pre-A he used to always say ILU during ... I guess, the key is to not let it bother me, but encourage his small steps.
One of the things he said recently during a conversation, is that he was jealous of my friendships with men. I recently connected with old friends and have made some new ones. But, this is H - he always says the opposite of what he means - some part of me suspects that he wants me to find someone new in my life so he doesnt feel guilty of leaving me for the ow. Could this be possible?
But even if this is possible, I am going to continue trying to see if it is possible to save the M. But I am going to do it with the following attitude: 'Hope for the best, but expect the worst'. I think this will help me detach - this I find very difficult to do.
), here's a brief re-cap.
