Insights into the LD Woman's Mind

[MJontheMend]

If it is for the kids' sakes, have you told your wife, "I am staying for the sake of the kids but once they are grown, I will likely leave, despite the fact that I love you very much."
If not, why not? Don't you think she deserves to know what your plans are wrt her life?

I agree with this 100%, but maybe the reason you aren't telling her this or whatever else would be a true statement about your current position is because you are afraid if you said this then she would react by leaving you and you would lose your current relationship with your kids just for stating your mind. Is that the case? You might want to consider phrasing it in the manner that I did which was approximately "You know I have been unhappy with our sex life for years but I haven't taken a stand on the issue because I have made the kids a higher priority. Now that the kids are getting older, I need to look ahead and I know that I won't be happy with the status quo. I suppose I could have waited to address this issue until the kids actually move out, but that seems pretty cold to me. I love you and I would like try and work things out before it comes to that.". Of course even if you say something like this in as nice a manner as possible, I would recommend that you remove all objects that might be thrown and or broken from the room and think of the worst word your W might use to describe you and prepare to hear it.