LOL - as a teenage babysitter I found a stack of unmentionable reading material and read a story all about a woman in stirrups and a physiologist doing a study of sexual desire, orgasm etc... Ever since then I've had a few little stirrings while on the table...
I didn't actually have any stirrings while in the stirrups, but I did enjoy the abdominal exam. He stood at the side of the table and ran his hands lightly over me, asking Does this hurt, does this hurt. Normally when an MD is doing that, they are actually touching you hard enough to hurt you. Dr. Kildare was so gentle. Then the good feelings were gone when he got down to business, and sat down on the stool, and really did start hurting me, lol.
My H would KILL me for saying this. He can be very jealous.
A little jealousy is a nice thing. It means that your H doens't take you totally for granted. My H is only rarely jealous. I can't help but giggle a little when he is.
HP, yeah, I know all about that bluntness. I'm hitting that dissillusionment we talked about a few weeks ago myself right now. Lately, I've been letting the knowledge that she's participating in and even initiating sexual encounters for my benefit rather than because it is what she enjoys bother me. (Gawd, is that an awful sentence or what?). Anyway, it has put me in a bit of a funk thinking that what feels to her as a monumental stretch looks to me like minimal effort. I guess I give her an A for the mechanical effort toward sex, but no more than a D for internalizing it and trying to grow out of her LDness like Cinemanymph is doing. I have problems with her current approach: 1) She hasn't internalized it, and therefore I feel like a real shiit having her do things that she is only doing to please me, and 2) because she hasn't internalized it, it stops if she isn't constantly reminded that I need lurv. As a result, I've been finding it very hard to initiate, instead I get thoughts along the lines of me being selfish, and what does she want instead of just doing it. in the end, I wind up keeping to myself and getting resentful about the whole thing, which darned it I know isn't healthy. Time for another kick in my but. What ever happened to Corrie anyway? Could really use a strong dose of her medicine right about now!
GGB, I think the best solution in your situation is to tie down MrsGGB and give her an O.
I can somewhat imagine being LD, and working through that towards a more fulfilling sex life with my spouse, but I cannot imagine being LD and not knowing what I am missing. Or....what's a better way to say it. I can see in her situation that her motivation for "wanting it for herself" would be greatly diminished if she's inorgasmic.
Speaking for myself, as a fellow female, penetration without an eventual O is not all that titillating. It feels great, don't get me wrong, but this sensation alone is certainly not enough to make me dream about it or look forward to it.
I know I keep beating this dead horse but I see it as crucial in your situation where your wife is actually pretty good at just doing it but can't seem to get to the place where she looks forward to it.
P.S. The "return trip nookie" you mentioned on the other thread...was it the trip to my and HD's fair state?
Yeah, I gotta be honest, the thought of tying her down and not stopping till she has an O has crossed my mind many times. She's repeatedly said no F'ing way am I going to tie her up... and without her being restrained, she physically stops me before she gets to the top of the hill. I think tying her up might do the trick, but at the same time, I fear it could backfire and erase all the progress I've made over the past year. I'm all ears!
Nope, this was a customer visit to the west coast. 10 hours of airports and sardine cans called airplanes each way for a 6 hour meeting that could have easily been done on the phone is not my idea of a fun time, but hey if it makes the customer happy seeing my smiling face....Anyway, that trip is in the beginning of August.
Quote: Lately, I've been letting the knowledge that she's participating in and even initiating sexual encounters for my benefit rather than because it is what she enjoys bother me. (Gawd, is that an awful sentence or what?).
I'm not sure what you are expecting, then. She is trying to participate more often, to initiate more often... give her a break! Of course it is a monumental stretch for her, because she wants NONE OF IT! It seems like a small thing to you, because it's not an effort for you. Different perspectives! You are having sex, and if it feels like it is only for your benefit, then appreciate the fact that she loves you enough to want to give you that much! If she eventually starts to internalize it, and really gets into it, you've struck gold!
Quote: I guess I give her an A for the mechanical effort toward sex, but no more than a D for internalizing it and trying to grow out of her LDness like Cinemanymph is doing.
You're really asking for a lot! Asking someone to 'grow out of' their LDness is like asking someone to 'grow out of' their left handedness... really not useful or pleasant, unless one has a broken left hand!
I can understand that it is still a blow to you, and that it would be really nice to have her WANT to have sex with you, but you have to remember that she is TRYING! She isn't hitting 100%, but she is TRYING! The other option isn't so good...
JenOTI yes, intellectually, I know that, and really a lot of the time I am OK with it. Other times, like now, I get into a funk about it and have a hard time shaking it off. It really hurts me to see her stuggling like that, to the point that I am finding it very hard to initiate and occasionally losing my E when we are ML. If you look back in my posts, you'll see that I've given her a lot of credit for stretching herself. It is jsut times like now, I see the distance between where she is and where I want her to be rather than the distance she has already come.
Last night, I was looking through the mail and there was a Fredericks of hollywood catalog in the mail. I opened it up and made a light comment along the lines of lets see if there's anything you'd like in here. It was met with a stern I'm too fat for any of that stuff, which just totalled the night for me.
