Journal: Last night was our scheduled sex night. I was reading the paper and H was watching tv when he suddenly shut it off and said, Let's go ML. I said, The way you said that made it sound like it was the last chore to do before you get to go to sleep. (not in a pissy tone, just a Come on H, you can do better than that tone) He said, Welllll it IS getting late and we did agree to do it tonight. I replied, You are not exactly making me weak in the knees ya know.. By then we were standing and hugging and kissing and he started to get aroused. This got me curious and I (dumb, I know) said, How come you want to ML tonight but not last night? Last night, you were turned on same as you are now, but you were not interested..? He replied that it was too late. I wanted to say, Well maybe it is time to start paying attention to your body and its flickers and feelings of desire and not so much the clock and the "right time"...but I didn't. I was trying not to ruin the mood, but he just got things off on a bad foot with the "let's get this over with" declaration.
So I went off to take a shower and jokingly offered to get him toothpicks to hold his eyeballs open while I was cleaning up. I came out of the shower and he was nowhere to be found. I finally figured out he went down to our basement to do a little spackling. I was feelin ballsy so I waltzed down there bare ass naked and invited him to finish what he started. Somewhere along the way, resentment overtook me. I started thinking, Dammit he just suggested this..why does he have to start that and demonstrate to me that he's doing his duty, and is really in the mood to work on the basement? And, furthermore, how come it was too late to ML last night but it's not too late to spackle TONIGHT?
So it took me forever to get aroused and into the whole deal and I nearly did not finish. Today I feel better but I did point out to him, at some point, that I'd love to see him HORNY for me. Not just willing to keep his end of the scheduled bargain but HORNY. He hemmed and hawed and didn't know how to answer that. I don't know what kind of answer I was expecting or what is even realistic.
I can't help but feel, though, that if he can show unbridled enthusiasm about spackling holes in the basement, then he can drum some up for his naked wife!
However, I do want to say that we are having a good day. I had to get that off my chest so that I was not still pissy about it tonight.
