Yes, I do think W has low self-esteem. I’m not sure how that jibes with the C’s diagnosis of a “narcissistic personality”, but it does.
Your, “Why would she find me sexy. Why would she want this” is something else that’s spot on. MrsBube has never actually said those words, but I still hear them loud and clear – and frequently. I can relate to the job interview thing too. W has been a SAHW and SAHM ever since we got married, so the specific instance of a job interview doesn’t apply, but the attitude does. MrsBube frequently looks to me for reassurance in areas where she is clearly much more competent than I.
Her cakes are a good example. She has been doing cakes for close to 20 years. They invariably look and taste great regardless of whether it’s a simple kid’s birthday cake or some complex wedding cake with columns and fountains and all sorts of fancy foofaraw. I have never once seen a disappointed look or heard anything but the highest praise for any of her cakes. She has multiple repeat customers. Yet with every single cake, I have to bolster her confidence. With every one, she says something like, “It doesn’t look very good does it?” Or more frequently, she’ll ask me if it looks alright and then start pointing out all the defects to me.
